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Top relationship building tips for super responsive newsletters.

Or ... how to build a relationship with your mailing list.

Relationship building is a magical ability that is the sum of many factors. To be truly effective, you have to combine honesty and reliability with trustworthiness. Throw in a degree of outspokenness, a good measure of charm and the ability to demonstrate empathy with your reader. Some of these attributes are hard to learn if you don't naturally have them, but until you do, your career as a writer of ezines and newsletters may be a struggle.

Time, practice and experience will hone your communication skills, but in the short term, let's look at what I believe are the critical factors in effective relationship building with your readers that you can apply straight away.

The first and foremost secret is to never think about your readers as a list. 'List' is way too anonymous. You can't ever build a relationship with a list - relationships are for people.

When I sit down to write Kickstart Today, I never write to a list. I write to Richard, who I met for the first time at a seminar and who sent me a Christmas card. I write to Pearson, who started out as a subscriber and soon became a close mate. I write to Margaret, who sends me lovely emails. I write to my daughter, who reads Kickstart at work.

Keeping the image of one person in your mind is easy. Your writing becomes more of a conversation. And the more you write the easier it gets because readers will naturally write to you with comments and you can then keep them in mind as you answer them.

Then, the funny thing is that I get emails from all kinds of other people saying 'how did you know that that was *exactly* what I wanted to hear?' Like astrological star signs there are only so many problems to go round. Write about one and you'll resonate with hundreds of people.

When you imagine yourself writing for one person, the rest of the crowd will eagerly listen in. But if you write to the crowd, you'll soon alienate the individual.

As far as writing ezines and newsletters are concerned, over and over again I see so-called experts writing hoary old advice:

1. Use the words I and Me as infrequently as possible and concentrate on 'you' and 'your'. Readers don't want to hear about you.

2. Train your list into a buying mood by selling them something every time you communicate with them.

Both are nonsense if building relationships that are what you want to do.

Ask yourself this question: when did you last establish a relationship with a text book? The much quoted ratio of one 'I' to every five 'you's' will lead you to a style of writing that may be informative, but is not personal. As well as the good information you have to provide, your readers want to know about you and your life - witness the rise in popularity of blogs.

In my opinion - and experience - you simply can't talk about yourself too much! Whenever I talk about my family and friends, the number of emails I get from subscribers eager to know more rockets! Of course, you can't run a newsletter that is entirely about you! That stuff should only be the icing on a rich, content-filled cake.

The best ezines and newsletters balance both, providing a cocktail of solid factual information punctuated by the real-life soap opera content that keeps the reader coming back for more.

It is the personal information that is most effective for relationship building because the same things are happening in the lives of each one of your readers to a greater or lesser extent. By sharing your humanity you are putting yourself at the same level as the reader. Each time he or she say's 'yes, that's happened to me' or 'I thought that too' you have found a new best friend.

Then there is the vexed question of how often you should try to sell things to your readers. The nature of a newsletter lends itself to constantly bombarding your poor readers with offer after offer, but unless you have a great writing style and personality to match, it can be counterproductive.

You will sometimes find a newsletter writer who has mastered the art of the constant hard sell, but most who try it just end up looking over-eager to grab your money.

My own policy is to only recommend things that I've used and love, and to only recommend anything when I'm moved to. That means I often go weeks without recommending a single product, but when I do tell my readers about something, they appreciate the recommendation.

Frequency of publication is another factor to consider that can affect your relationship building with your readers.

Many ezines and newsletters publish monthly - way to infrequently, in my view, for serious relationship building. Even weekly publication can be slow if you are not a strong and personal writer.

As you develop as a writer you'll find it easier to write more often. You don't need to write huge newsletters every time - it is the frequency of contact that matters, not the length of your prose! So long as you are interesting and amusing you can publish every day if you like. Just don't become boring!

I still get dozens of emails whenever I skip an issue!

It goes without saying that over-use of other people's writing in your newsletter can damage your relationship building if you aren't careful.

Which brings me to content. Many people still think that a newsletter can be a mish-mash of guest articles. I'm sorry to have to tell you that that particular model stopped working well several years ago. Now, your readers want to hear what you think, what you have to say, what your experiences are. And to provide them with that you've got to sit down and learn to write.

And when you do start learning to write, forget most of the rubbish that you learned in school or business. Write like you'd talk to a close friend, not to your teacher or business client.

Write conversationally, using conversational grammar (sentences CAN start with and, contractions are better than okay!)

Which brings us right back to the beginning - when you sit down to write, every paragraph that leaves your fingers is a conversation with one person who is sitting in front of you. An old friend, not a list. Relationship building has nothing to do with lists, it is about reaching one person at a time.

Article Source: http://www.topicinfo.com

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